Sunday, July 8, 2007

I Wait

A broken step
Leads me to an open door, I step
Into empty rooms.
Searching, slowly, at first
Then remember the way.
I feel I never left.
I turn, hopefully, only to see nothing,
But dust and cobwebs, a tiny spider
Dangling from a thin spindly web.

"Where are you?" I scream.
Nowhere, everywhere, places I cannot go.
"Why did you leave me?" I cry, to silent rooms.
Only echos answer , no voice,
An imagined memory of a sweet laugh,
And cold, still, silence.

Stepping through doorways, treading up stairways,
Searching for clues, for signs, for meanings.
Through the window I see a yard filled with young boys
Engrossed in a game of ball, hot, sweaty, covered in dirt
Their laughter filling a hot summer day.
I blink, and see an empty field, overgrown,
Tall dead grass blowing in a cold soundless wind.

"Why did you go?" I whisper.
"Tell me you are here, somehow, someway, oh, please."
"Some little sign for you and me, I'll tell not a soul."
I hear my own heartbeat,
Holding my breath, in stillness, in dust,
In an empty house where a family lived,
Flooded with memories, I wait.


Spadoman said...

I am waiting too. Sometimes, I am with you. Sometimes all of us are in the same room, waiting together, but never speaking to each other. We wait for our time to go and see them all on the other side. We know that's where they are. They're waiting too. Waiting for us.

For me, dear girl, June is when we lost her, July is her birthday. It's summer and we should be having fun but the underlying sadness will never leave completely. After all these years, I realize i don't want it to. It becomes part of us, who we are, why we live.

I'm with you, praying, waiting. I'll hold your hand. We'll all hold hands in a circle while we wait. A small comfort for a friend.

singleton said...

I just wanted to let you know I've been here a half dozen times and read these words and Spado's too, and
I know I should have told you
I'm waiting
with you.
God Bless you all....
No words big enough...